World Mental Health Day

Today is World Mental Health Day. A day to bring and shed light on those who are like you and me who live with mental health issues every day. Today is a day to be loud about it and make it know that it’s okay to be okay. In addition to be a voice who do not have a voice. Today I want to share a few things that I have done with my mental health as a way for you to use or add other resources and helps to the conversation.

How do you start the Conversation of Mental Health with Loved Ones?

This is always hard. Many people suffer in silence because to tell others how they feel will cause more issues than not. Also this is a sad situation. For those of you who feel as if you do not ever have mental health issues to be an ally for those who do you have to have a heart to listen without judgement. The way you smirk, talk about, make comments, and put down someone you don’t know sets the tone for how you treat those who you love that are dealing with it. There are many people who suffer because they know that the ones closest to them will betray them.

If you are ready to talk to loved ones about your mental health issues remember a few things:

• Be selective in who you talk or are open with
• Tell them as little or much that you choose
• Set boundaries in how you want them to participate
• Disengage immediately if you feel triggered while talking
• Set a goal before the conversation

Resources for Mental Health/Getting Started

People always ask what the first place to get resources. The answer is going to be determined by your personal situation. For instance, if you work one of the best places to start is at work through your EAP (Employee Assistance Program). This can be done without your job knowing what you are getting help with.

This is a suitable place to start. You get to call in and tell them that you need to speak to a counselor and a general reason so they can map you to the right therapist. They do all the heavy lifting. The research and making sure that after your free services that your insurance will cover you for more sessions after.

Doctors Can Help Too

When I first started therapy in 2010 a year after the birth of my oldest, my first place of refugee to get help was my doctor. One thing I have to say is that you should be honest with three people: you, God, and your doctor. The reason is lying where the help is will not help you get the help you need. I walked into my doctor’s office and asked her if I could talk to her about some of the feelings I was having.

She immediately wrote down what I was saying, recapped what I said, and then said here is what you can do. I went to talk to a psychiatrist to get evaluated and then to a therapist. Don’t let the word Psychiatrist scare you. They are designed to aid in making the determination on the naming of your mental health. They also prescribed a medication in 2011 when I was suffering with postpartum.

The doctor, psychiatrist, and my therapist worked hand in hand to help make sure that I was safe, getting in alignment, and had the help that I needed. Tell them everything. Let them guide you but remember you make the final decision.

Online Therapy

When I started therapy if there was online option, I wasn’t aware of it. So now with the help of online therapy you can talk to someone on the phone, on your laptop or phone. This is a convenience especially for those who work hours that don’t allow them to take off work to get the help you need. Like the doctors do not lie. Be honest. They are therapist. Do not allow others to tell you that they aren’t. They are trained to help. One of the online therapy tool for online that I use is Better help.

Honesty with Mental Health

I have mentioned honesty a few times because it is important. This your time to bare your soul. With therapy or any other tool that you use it will not immediately make you happy. This is a process. Do not get frustrated or if you do don’t give up. There are times when you leave therapy and find that you are angry, tired, or feel blah afterwards.

While being honest, make sure that the people you confide in that you set the boundaries. There are some people in my life who know I am in and out of therapy because I talk about it on socials and the blog. I do not share with them the details because I can’t trust them.

Set Boundaries Early

Set the boundaries like who you confide in that this information is not to be shared. I made that mistake with my own husband years ago and we had to correct it. It was hard but I was honest about how I felt about what he had done. I talk about that on the podcast, Conversations with Toi.

Today is world mental health day. No matter how you decide to be open about your journey. I wish you well. These next couple of months will be hard with the holidays coming up. Please prepare for the holiday anxiety and more. Be always gentle with people. Treat people the way you want to be treated because you don’t know what they are going through.