Women History Month: Ila McKee

As we continue our series of interviewing women for women’s history month, we catch up to Ila McKee, a woman, mother, podcast personality, and overall a strong woman full of confidence to conquer anything thrown her way!

Women and Failing

In life is all failure really a fail?  Failure is often determined by not trying.  If you want to go back to school but you never fill out an application is a failure.  However going and having to retake courses is not. We have to be willing to always see our goals and pursue them in all adversities. We have to be willing to get in the game of life instead of watching only from the sidelines.

As women there have been many times in history where the things we have achieved have come under scrutiny.  However often times no disrespect to a man, we had the finesse to make the goal a reality.  Women are strong individuals and there is nothing we can’t do.

What is one failure you are comfortable sharing that taught you the most lessons? From that or any failure, what other lesson not mentioned in the question above have you learned?

I don’t believe in failure so to speak. For me failure is a state of mind. It took me more than 25 years throughout my life to come to terms with the notion that “FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION”. I may slow down at completing a goal or task I set out to do, I may even get distracted, but to fail overall; not happening. To me failing is to never try.

Whether it’s trying a new dish out at a new restaurant, putting in an application for that dream career, or asking that cute guy who gives you “that stare” every morning when I order my coffee; I might hear “application declined”, the food may not be as tasty as I hoped or that cute guy might say “he’s taken/not interested” but it doesn’t mean I failed. It just means I must find another equation to get the answer I desired.

I’d much rather lived knowing I tried and repeatedly tried at what I put my hear tor mind to, than to have not tried and live with the never-ending question of “what if”. Failure is only possible if you never try. My step father (the man who raised me and my siblings as a single father) taught me this at a very young age. For this I can’t thank him enough.

What are is the 3 things you would want to tell other younger woman in regard to lessons learned?

Self confidence if KEY! Never allow anyone to categorize of tell you what you are and are not capable of accomplishing.
Nothing is forever and EVERYDAY is a chance to change your life for the better. So, live in the moments that make you happy. Repeat those moments and make new ones as often as possible. Stay away from negative or past regrets; you can’t change them and reliving them will not do anyone any good. Dwelling on bad times does one thing; only wastes your time now.
DO NOT let 1 “No” stop you from reaching your goals or dreams You may will go through 1 million “No’s”. But all it takes is one “YES”!

When you hear confidence in a woman its the sexiest thing on her.  When I think about my own personal younger self I remember how carefree it makes go back to my 18-year-old self.  We as women know that we can do anything. Sometimes we let the hang ups of setbacks stop us. Setbacks are apart of our walk. You’re not failing or falling you are simple tripping gracefully.  When you realize that in your missteps there is usually grace that follows and that your goals are being altered to fulfill your greater purpose, you got this! You can be afraid, upset, hurt, or even in tears but always take the first step. In the first step, fear can’t remain!

What are your 3 goals for your future?

To ensure that my children, my family and myself are completely financially stable and able to live comfortably.

To continue to install positive morals and integrity in my children’s lives that they apply to their own lives and their future children’s lives generations to come.

To live a healthy (mentally and physically), happy life at peace with all terms in my life. Anything else I set my mind to accomplish if I work hard for it and keep my faith in allowing Gods will. He hasn’t failed me ever

If you could sit down with any woman past or present who would that be?

My mother; Mary Evelyn McKee. She took her life when I was 12 years old. There are just so many things I never got the chance to ask her. I’d be content with just being able to be in her presence again. She was a positive light in anyone’s life who crossed her path. If anything, just to let her know I love her, to tell her about her grandchildren and just be able to laugh with her again. To give her comfort in knowing her legacy lives on through her family and that I love and miss her dearly.

I know your mom is proud of you and your fight to always continue in the excellence that she instilled in you.  Not only are you an amazing mom, your mom is still guiding you!

IF you have any projects that are coming up in the future what are they?

I’m currently working on a memoirs book that details my life and lessons I’ve learned along the way. Also, a possible anthology in conjunction with my production owners at TCP Network. But that’s going to take some time. I’ve always said I would do. What better time than now?!
I’m currently hosting and coordinating with my colleagues on Raw Royalty Podcast; a raw unfiltered public radio station and podcast with professional woman who are career minded, some are mothers, we’re all hard workers, spiritual and unfiltered about expressing our views on life and its many lessons.

Building our name and our brand to be an international household name. Working on Raw Royalty Podcast brand marketing for future merchandise, skin care  products and beauty products, in conjunction with our production company The Culture Professional Network and the affiliated clothing brand Regal Finesse. Also hosting upcoming events as well as producing/operating a few events ourselves. You can also find Raw Royalty Podcasts on Instagram

What is the one thing as a woman that you believe women need to know to make their mark in this world?

To always believe in yourself. No matter what your circumstances are. Bad times never last forever, neither do good times. So, learn from the bad times and cherish all the good times. Above everything remember YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS WORLD. Because while you are stressing about your troubles and trying to think of “master plans” to solve them, there are more than 7.7billion people in this world doing the same exact thing; just trying to live a happy life and survive life struggles. YOU ARE NOT ALONE….

Thank you Ila.  You’re a woman, a mom, a bomb podcast personality and you are a woman who hasn’t let a setback stop you from crushing your goal!  ToiTime appreciates you and wishes you well on your memoir and life journey.