ToiTime

Mental Wellness and Self Care Queen

I’m all for a good bubble bath, listening to amazing music, and writing in my journal. These are just a few examples of self-care ideas. I try to make sure I do one of these examples once a day if not more depending on the day!  Sometimes we forget that self-care is beyond Sunday leisure day and need a reminder that self-care is anything that brings you from a place of darkness into light.

Bad Days

I know I’m not the only one who has had a bad day? However in this day and time, with stress at an all time high, people are floundering and bath time ain’t fixing it! Hair appointments and nail appointments aren’t healing people’s broken places. Some of the things that we once used simply don’t work! Let me step back it’s not that it won’t work it’s more or less not enough for many. So what now? What will work?

Broken Places

Sometimes when you’re broken all you focus on is the pieces. It’s understandable. This weekend I was putting up new pictures in the bathroom and one of them fell. No matter what I did while using the command strips the picture fell. As the shattered glass laid on the floor I was so irritated. That’s our lives at times. It’s hurtful, shattered, and it’s frustrating. I couldn’t leave the pieces on the floor because the broken pieces would only hurt someone else. You catch that word? Ever seem to find when you’re broken even wind blowing irritates you. You lash out on others? Your family usually bears the brunt of your brokenness? Yup! It’s the brokenness of what you expected versus reality and it doesn’t always pan out.

Into The Light

What do you need to bring you into the light? I know that there’s a list of things, some unattainable that feel like it would make you better, happier, joyful, etc. Often times we find that it doesn’t measure up. It’s not enough to keep you. This is why even rich folks can be miserable. We don’t figure out what really makes us step into true light. I’ve been figuring it out ever since the pandemic. We all have to some extent. The things we love and rely on have been cut. We have had to be super creative in how we interact too. It’s forcing our hand with the reality of life and adjustments.

Darkness Doesn’t Last

It feels like it’s forever. It looks like light has never existed. However we all know that light is ever present even in the darkest of nights. Light is waiting to be illuminated. The sadness and frustration we feel is real but it will pass. Sometimes it takes us working ourselves out from the inside out. We have to find the things that make us sparkle. The things that brings us peace. I’ve always started with eliminating negative things and people. Second get clear about goals and more importantly revamp. We tend to feel defeated by what’s not happening until we figure out that it’s not happening for a reason. It sound cliche but the reality is rejection is a way of protection.

So how can self-care bring us out of light? Practicing it with gratefulness pushes us beyond the darkness of our temporary situations. I’ve had many times where I had to continue pushing through. It’s not giving up because it’s tight! Not giving up because you feel uncomfortable. Not giving up on up just because the plan is on pause. A pause is not the end of the world. A pause is a way to be creative, redesign and realign.

Self-Care Beyond Darkness

Therapy: did you know it’s a form of self-love to take care of your triggers? It’s not for everyone but everyone can find benefit in it!

Personal Development: again improving yourself isn’t selfish. Who exactly will be more vested in you? Most likely no one and you should always have a higher stake in yourself

Boundaries: people don’t think about it but boundaries is a form of self-care. You don’t need to let people in your space that aren’t worthy of it. Giving too much access won’t make people like you more it just allows people the opportunity to step all over you.

You will never do your nails enough to make the inner workings of you better if you don’t put in the energy. Working on your insides first makes the outside glow. Peace is costly and you if you’re not careful you may be in debt. Always let peace be the route you take in all things.

Self-Care Surface

What are you doing beyond the surface levels of self-care? Lately I’ve been taking things off my schedule and telling people no. No is a strong word that looks small but is mighty. It’s power in removing things out of your way. I also have been delegating tasks. Outsourcing is a necessary tool. I’m not an island. I don’t need to do it all! With that mentality, it gives my me time more validity.

I wish the world was in a better state. I wish that all of the bad events, the folks that exercise bad judgement, and bad times would turn for the better. The truth is it most likely won’t. We all have personal responsibilities to ourselves that if we walk upright would extend to others around us.

Self Care Sunday Funday

As you begin your Sunday reflect. Take some time out to really ask yourself if you’re doing enough inner work to combat the things happening around you? I’ve found that bad times reveal inner strengths and weaknesses.

Do your self-care activities but amp it with inner work. When you feel like light is gone, acknowledge the feeling. Find out what is your underlying issue and focus on fixing it from the inside out. Work on you without feeling bad for it.

Have a happy Sunday! Oh and today is international day of forgiveness. We all know how hard it is to forgive! To help read the blog I have on forgiveness too!

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