Today is National Stress Awareness day. A day to remind you that stress happens and that life doesn’t always have a blueprint. Many of are aware of our stress. We feel it in our body, mind, and sometimes our heart. Stress is prevalent and if you’re not careful the awareness of it can be overwhelming. So as we remind ourselves to live stress free moments, let’s talk about the realism of how stress affects our world.
Stress and The People Around Us
No matter what your titles in this world are, stress doesn’t simply bypass us if we simply tell it to go. Being proactive in your mental health and lead a healthy lifestyle won’t make us immune to bad days and moments. So when life is throwing curve balls and you feel like you are missing your mark how do you manage in those moments. It’s one thing to be optimistic but sometimes the optimism fades. This is a one of those skills that is made to be stronger as time goes by. Doing the work to have a plan, supportive people in your corner, and having a plan when those two things fail is key.
In therapy right before the pandemic my therapist said let’s work on a safety plan. I was a little apprehensive. Why would I need a safety plan just because I am stressed. However many people express stressful events differently. Some will neglect their basic needs. Others are more hypersensitive as they are able to appear to take on the world without even blinking but inside feel like a failure.
What is your Safety or Supportive Plan?
My personal safety plan is learning to recognize that one or two things need my attention and then being willing to get help. For example, before the pandemic i noticed that certain things that I enjoyed I would withdraw. This is a sign of depression. However bigger than that is not allowing these withdraws to become overbearing to my progress. This means for me that once I start to withdraw from one or two things no matter it’s size being okay to reach out. Reaching out is probably one of my hardest things to do. It’s not about not wanting to be a burden. Sometimes its not knowing what is going on or how to express what you need.
It’s like asking my husband that I need help with laundry, needing help with the dishes but unsure that what I really needed is a floor mopped. Simple things no longer make sense. It is scary.
Stress as Isolation
If you have ever lived you know that stress can make you isolated. Think about a single mother who needs things for their children. Instead of asking for it they hide. They don’t want others to look down on them or have an honest assessment that they aren’t capable and need the help of their village. FYI for any mom struggling with the fact that the village seems non existent, you aren’t alone.
Not feeling your best because although you’re aware of your stress doesn’t always feel like enough. Some things require more than hope. They require money to resolve an issue, support to move towards healing, or even a plan that even with good intentions can fail. Here are some things I do when I am personally stressed that I shouldn’t do:
- Increase alcohol intake
- Eat more food that have no nutritional value in excess
- Over or under sleep
- Increase irritability that alters the tempo of my life and home
- Take my anger out on others
What I do when I become aware and develop an action plan?
No one can plan for stressful moments. They happen all day even with children. Having the most utmost calming appearance and demeanor is a gift and a curse. People have an expectation that you aren’t in need of simple love and encouragement. Not receiving the love and support in the way that you need it depletes your cup.
Here’s what I do when I am aware of stress and actively work towards self awareness and preservation.
It’s no longer to know stress, see stress coming, and not do anything about it when you can. It is imperative to thrive instead of existing.
- Add more days where I decrease alcohol intake
- Take meal prepping to the next level so on days where eating
- Say no to things that saying no to is preserving your mental health and peace
- Live in constant
- Apply therapy lessons learned in real time.
We are aware of our stress. Sometimes be willing to understand ourselves is key. Take advantage of more down time. We weren’t ever meant to struggle forever. Be kind to yourself.
Stress Resources:
Tips to help with stress according to the Mayo Clinic
Style Caster Mental health action plan
Postpartum depression talk from my personal experience
Teen Mental Health with the CDC
If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org
