Monday Motivation: Mental Wellness Check In

Since its May and Mental Health Month we have to dispel the looks of mental wellness. Mental wellness is a something we all have. Some people have mental health issues. This simply means that their wellness isn’t aligned. This is why it’s hard to call them issues. If they are issues it’s something that on levels we all experience. So let’s talk what it looks like to experience an imbalance of mental wellness,

You don’t Look Like Something is Wrong

We attribute smiles or laughter to someone who has it all together. These are people who lives look like they are living super well. They eat well. Drink well. However even the most cheeriest of person can be in a room full of people and suffer in silence. There is no certain look to mental wellness. Mental wellness affects everyone differently. So we have to understand that you can’t simply look at someone and figure them out. It comes out when they express it. So let’s end the conversation that you can simply tell if someone isn’t mentally well.

End the Disparaging Comments About Mental Wellness

Have you ever heard someone say-oh she (he) must be having a mental breakdown. Sometimes you can see someone having a breakdown. Other times someone could also have had a bad day. Or simply trying to gather themselves. For instance, I was having a bad day. Someone says “oh you must be mentally unwell.” They only reason they felt comfortable saying that is because I share it openly that I deal with anxiety and depression. I was simply having a bad day. The person I was talking to was being a jerk. Instead of taking responsibility for how they were talking and treating me it felt right  to them to say it must be me.

I was strong enough to set them straight. Many are not. You shouldn’t use the information about someone’s mental wellness as a way to treat them wrong. Mental wellness is a health related issue. It’s common no different than a cold. Isolating people due to their mental wellness issues isn’t okay. When you do it to others in conversation, deed or more you alert those around you who haven’t shared that you are not an appropriate ally.

Monday Motivation for Wellness

Mental wellness is apart of our everyday life. So if you are starting today dealing with an aspect of mental health issue remember that you are not alone. Not only are you not alone, there are many things that can help you feel like the you that you seek. There were many times when I would wake up feeling like I didn’t want to get up. It’s normal. You don’t have to have a mental wellness issue to feel like that. It’s an overwhelming feeling to not feel like you. Start with taking each moment one at a time. Ask yourself a few questions:

• What do I need right NOW?
• Have I taken care of me-food, drink, basic needs, etc
• Who is in my support system-friend, therapist, doctor, spouse
• How active have I been? Often times we don’t get up and move
• What can I do right now that will make a difference? See above for the small things that can assist

Letting Go of the Things you can’t change

There are things that are completely out of our control. We can’t always make enough money or have enough resources all the time. But I can change myself. Get up and eat. Get some water. Journal your feelings. Take a walk. Have an honest conversation. If you are in a situation where you feel you are the only one in your home dealing with a mental wellness. For instance when I would be going through etc., my husband couldn’t understand. I felt isolated and alone. When I got into therapy, my therapist told me how to approach the situation. It helped. Sometimes you think you are a unicorn and alone.

I had to let go of wanting my husband to fix me, or support me in ways that I wasn’t communicating. We will talk about communicating to others later in the week.

Being Uncomfortable

Keep in mind that having a mental wellness issue isn’t the end of it all. It feels that way. It’s a temporary feeling. Getting the help you need is key. You can have a great day. When you aren’t feeling right it’s okay to not have a good day. When you aren’t having a good day take a moment to let that moment linger. People will tell you to get over it. It’s not that easy. I learned to let the time happen and then deal with it. Sometimes we rush past that uncomfortable feeling and there’s a lot we can learn about ourselves in that moment.

How to Support Yourself

Take a moment even in your busy schedule to see what you need. I have found that sometimes I just needed to sit in a quiet room for 10 minutes to gather myself. It’s like a therapeutic moment. I allow myself to listen to a good song or podcast. Sometimes I write down affirmations for the day or my daily mission statement. This helps me to focus in huge ways. Eating is another place of supporting myself. I am the first to skip meals when I am in a mental health issue. So eating and drinking water does help. If you have a therapist think on your sessions and the help that they have offered. Have you follow through with their advice? For instance my therapist and I made a safety plan and I did step one but not step 2. Go back to the advice and implement it.

No matter what you are doing and where you are in your journey you are deserving. You are deserving of a good day, great friends, good food, and amazing things to happen to you. Don’t let this fleeting moment rob you of your joy. It takes away time for you to see how dope and brillant you really are.

Happy Monday! Be well. Live well. And when neither feels attainable-get help. Find someone who you can talk that will make you feel comfortable. Every clickable link is a resource so make sure you click on them. Also let’s not only think  about wellness when something is wrong but apart of our everyday check in process.