Happy Thanksgiving! It’s the day before the holidays how is your mental health? Are you okay? If not, it’s okay. Today could be a mix of feelings. I remember years ago feeling blah. Of course, there were times that I felt sad because of my choice to isolate from family, being single at one point, dealing with a new baby and postpartum depression at one point. So remember that your feelings are valid.
Mental Health Check-In
Your mental health is important. Do not allow yourself to feel as if you must go full speed ahead. Take some time to gather your thoughts. Take a deep breath. Put in some breaks from either taking breaks away from family or friends. If you have a no contact in order meaning you have decided to not speak to family do not feel pressured to speak to them from outside people. I went no contact a few years ago and I never entertained the conversation of “that’s your mom, dad grandma, aunt..” so you should talk to them. People think that their relationship with whom they love transfer to you. It doesn’t.
However, during the healing phase, my therapist suggested that one I don’t talk about the pain to a bunch of people. Burning the flame of something you want to also put out doesn’t make sense. So, I spoke to her and processed it in a healthy environment. No outside influences even though there were others who felt the same way. Burn the flame out while you heal.
Isolation vs Separation on Thanksgiving
As stated above I have isolated myself from my family. This was me not calling, not answering calls, not visiting, and no check ins with them. I wanted to ice them out while I healed. Honestly there was no way I could have healed being in direct communication with any of them. It has made a difference for me now. Separation for me is being around but limiting the time you spend with those who ignite your triggers. I have done that too where I control the times I leave. Be it that I am still involved, I allow my involvement as much as I see fit. For me, I do have a lot of boundaries with separation like no house visits and limited engagement.
Mental Health and Joy
Having and acknowledging your mental health struggles doesn’t mean that you are also sad all the time. For instance, I am taking care of me with my meds, balancing my duties, and more. This Thanksgiving I am feeling grateful and calm. There aren’t any underlying issues. This is a drastic move from years ago where I had to have therapy on Thanksgiving Day to get through it. I was a wreck, and it was bad. This week I have been doing all the things that I need to stay in joy.
Thanksgiving Things to Do
I have a lot to cook. However instead of stressing I will be taking the kids to a fun Christmas filled adventure. I will cook when I get home. This is a lot to do but I want to make sure my kids enjoy their break. We have a lot planned for them and added in some rest days. What are you needing to do that you can add some slow down time in? Since tomorrow is Thanksgiving people are more prone to listen to Christmas music. For the ones that do not do it before November that is okay. For me Christmas music is a mood booster. So, I have been listening since November 1st.
If you are looking for Christmas things to do while you are off or having some down time you can check out this blogpost to get you ready. You can also add Tinsel Bar to your list of fun. I went last night and it was a good time. I must suggest that you limit yourself to two drinks. The drinks are strong or have an elf drive you home to avoid being on the naughty list.
Either way enjoy your Thanksgiving and I will be back with at least a new episode of Conversations with Toi Friday. I am going to talk Thanksgiving Day, Diddy and Cassie and more.Enjoy!
