As always I like to do a mental health check in every now and again. The reason being is many times seeing my content online may appear that I don’t need to do mental health check-ins. That is the furthest from the truth. In addition to weekly therapy in the last few months, group therapy, and also honesty checks with those closest to me, mental health is always my priority.
Social Media vs. Reality
My socials have been close to my real life. I purposely try to be as honest about where I am. Unlike many who highlight reels. If you follow my stories on Instagram for instance I share so much of honesty about the challenges of parenting, maintaining a healthy marriage, or just simply existing in spaces that I occupy.
It’s easy to think peoples lives are perfect when they aren’t. If you compare yourself to what you see trust me it’s going to lead you into a life of pain. We all compare ourselves. Also imposter syndrome is real. Keep in mind that many times if we think someone is doing better coveting what someone has becomes easy. However what you don’t see are the many failures that help them become successful. Often times we wouldn’t last in the shoes of those we see. People have layers of pain that they are fount through.
Reality of Life
Many times we need to know that our lives depend on not quitting. It’s easy to quit. Quitting feels comfortable. When times get hard quitting seems logical. I promise I’ve had times when quitting was the second best thing. One thing I know is when I haven’t quit and held on even by a thread, my life turned. My mental health in-between that hasn’t always been easy.
Crying, breakdowns, confused thoughts, and feeling alone trust me I’ve done it. But there’s hope.
Mental Health Highs
One thing I don’t like about mental health talks is making it seem as if all is bad all of the time. It’s not. I’ve learned so many good lessons about myself. My parenting has become stronger. Through the journey of my mental health I’ve been able to weed out friends and acquaintances. This has been beneficial to me in many ways. It also has given me the strength to know that all does work out.
Motivation
Has hard times ever motivated you to in a way that maybe the good couldn’t? I’ve had many times when being a hard head has gotten me into a wealth of trouble. As I’ve been told many times to change it didn’t take. So I had to run circles to my healing. One day while I was in a blaming circle, my therapist reminded me that if I removed myself from the bad situations and took charge I could make many turns. That is what happened.
Make Amends or Close the Door
When you have problems with others and you realize that you are the issue making amends helps. One thing to keep in mind, if you’re in a fault to keep in mind that you don’t have to take relationships back to their original state to show how sorry you are. When I tell you that was the light bulb that I needed. So I made peace. That peace wasn’t with the thought process of rolling over and moving on.
I apologized but also separated myself out. It was then I could see life for real. It was refreshing to be honest. Was I keeping relationships that I valued? Many I would say no. There were more relationships based on titles. So when I let go of the titles it was easy to treat others the same. Closing chapters became easier to do. Some of those chapters are still closed and not from an angry, victim, or weak place.
You can have a million wrongs-make them right. However take care of you. I learned to be honest, be vigilant, and use discernment in areas that needed a wake up call. Setting boundaries while simply living in the peace I was able to create has changed my world. Today’s mental health check in starts with you acknowledging your wrong doing. Showing up better than you left, apologizing, and changing your behavior, and taking care of you.
