Letter Writing for Mental Health

May is Mental Health Awareness. One of the things I hope changes in the United States and beyond is that all would have access to mental health care. Until that time many are struggling with things that they can do to help regulate their emotions. Many of us suffer from things that we aren’t even able to speak about in a safe environment. Triggers can happen at many points and finding things that you can do that is helpful and cost effective is key. Letter writing could be a great way to get your thoughts out and create your own safe space.

Letter Writing can be therapeutic

We have access to our phones or simply books that we can write out some of our feelings. A few months ago in addition to my personal therapy is including letter writing. This is a tactic that has been healing. If you struggle with one finding the words to say when you are in the middle of a moment this is a great way to get your thoughts out. For instance, around Mother’s Day I find that I can become triggered by my own motherhood. We aren’t able to hold true and authentic space and have an honest moment about the reality on taking care of others. If we say that we are tired then we are weak. If we are frustrated in many moments then the belief that we don’t want our portion of motherhood comes into questions.

I started writing letters to my younger self during these moments. The goal for me was to understand that if my upbringing is a trigger the likelihood of speaking to my parents about it and feel heard could be slim to none. Being able to say the things I wish that I had the courage to say is useful in my letter writing. It doesn’t mean that me writing it out will fix me. It’s about getting the words out and being honest with how I feel in the moment.

How to Write to Yourself

One of the things that I learned in journaling is that there are no rules. When you are writing a letter to yourself, a person who hurt you, or however you need to address it is that you don’t have to be proper in your writing. Sometimes when I do the exercise of writing, I may use few words. Simply writing out a few phrases or words may be all that I need. There have been times that I write a never ending letter. When I wrote a letter to my parents, that letter sometimes doesn’t have an ending. Remember these letters don’t have to be sent. This is an exercise that uses the concept of mind dumping to help you get the thoughts out.

When is the Best Time to Write?

Just like with the way you write the letter, the timing of it is up to you. I tend to write when I have a few moments of downtime. This for me is usually before bed. However I do keep a journal on me at all times. When I am traveling (not driving) I may write. You can do this for a few minutes or maybe an hour. It’s up to you. For those who do not carry journals do not be afraid to write a note on you phone. Make sure that you password protect if you have others who have access to your phones. Same with journals, I keep them in a locked drawer.

Benefits of Letter Writing

• Honesty and discovery
• Promotes self care
• Helps to see your growth even in difficult moments

A few things that letter writing did for me was to recognize patterns. If I find that there are underlying themes that are occur while I write out my feelings this is helpful for me to take back to my therapist and work through. Other things I have personally noticed was the ability to see a trigger that I ignored. Sometimes certain seasons can bring on triggers and if you are writing whether in a letter form or a journal you may be able to see it. This helps you prepare too. For instance it was through letter writing I was able to see that certain times of the year hits me harder than others. That helped me to be aware, and work on ways to combat it.

Know that with letter writing to people that have heart you, to yourself, and more will evoke feelings. The purpose is to provide an outlet that will lead to increased ability to see yourself and validate. Take some time after an intense letter writing session to give yourself grace.