Crash outs are when you feel as if you have lost it all. Some people do things like cry, break down, as well as feel overwhelmingly down. There are levels to crashing out. So,when you are feeling overwhelmed, alone, or distraught there are things you can do to bring a place of calm.
Acknowledge the Crash Outs
This is about being honest with your feelings. You mustacknowledge how you are feeling before you allow those feelings take over. The take over is what causes the crash outs. We all no matter what levels your mental health issues are on feel overwhelmed. That feeling affects us differently. For some they immediately get quiet. Do not think that getting quiet is the answer. You could be a walking timebomb for an explosive outburst or crash out.
Not Going to be a Crash out
Have you been seeing online where people are actively doing skits or songs about not being a crash out? Although layered in comedic timing and entertainment is still filled with truths. It’s like the saying goes, “two things can be true.” So, in the spirit of not crashing out we have to do some steps to protect ourselves and our mental well-being.
Steps to Avoiding the Mental Breakdown
- Acknowledge what’s happening and your feelings behind
- Determine if its situational or a continuous pattern
- Determine strategy even if it’s removing yourself or others
- What tools do you feel confident in using
- Do you need assistance?
The Patterns of a Crash out
Sometimes it’s not a one-off situation. We can be contributors of our own pain. So, when you see things happening over again there are two powers at play. One power is what is happening. The person or situation is wrong in how it is being downplayed or taking shape. The other dynamic to a continuous trigger that is the part that we play in it. My therapist asked me one day how much my loyalty cost? We never did produce an exact number. It was a demonstration of what I was allowing and the longevity that I didn’t have to continue down the road of pain.
These triggers need a strong enough action to stop it. For instance, my husband and I have been battling mentally and emotionally over a single incident that happened. The incident-was a year ago today. What I did in that year to not be a crash out was decenter him. Does that mean I didn’t love him? No but my peace was worth me taking a chance on me for once.
Strategize your healing
We focus on what the other person (s) have done for so long that we don’t focus on what we can do in our healing. During this past year I focused on my health, my kids, went out, ate well, took more solo trips intentionally, and started setting up my future with the possibility of him not being a part of that. What? Yes, I did. The strength that it showed I had and that acknowledgment that I am capable was more than enough to allow me healing. For some they could “neva.” That is okay.
For you doing what I would have done could have had you at the courthouse. I contemplated it. It simply meant for me that I needed to not be so focused on him while taking care of me. I got busy being a victor instead of a victim.
Assistance in Healing
Although I am not new to therapy my therapist that I have had in the last 9 months has helped me more than any other one before. Now does that mean the others weren’t helpful. No. It simply means that I needed some hard truth and was willing to hear it and move accordingly than ever before. Every week my therapist challenged me to do more for me and the decentering become easier. I didn’t have to not talk to my husband for an example I just focused on what I needed.
Our conversations were based on my desire to close issues not just place a band aid on them. My therapist then moved me over to biweekly appointments because I was doing the work.
Get the help
If you need assistance don’t pick the therapist that is going to hold your hand. Pick then one that is going to look at you, make you uncomfortable in the truth, make you mad at times, and then stand there like a proud parent as you conquer the fear.
Life is hard. There are a lot of events happening now that if you did crash out you would be well within the right to. Always remember even if you do crash out over a job, spouse, current state of events in the world, death of a family or friend, parenting, lack of being able to be a parent, ending of a friendship, and more it doesn’t have to be the end. No matter how hard of a crash out you become only you can do the work to get up and heal. Healing isn’t linear but you are worth finding away to be whole and healthy in body, mind, and spirit.
