Thanksgiving and being married can cause issues/arguments. So one of my readers sent me an email at 3am. I was sleep but I felt like if you’re sending me an email at 3 either you have an early work schedule, can’t sleep, or worried. Either way here is the question: what do I do if drama at my in-laws takes place at Thanksgiving dinner? Simple answer is have an exit plan.
Married and Thanksgiving/Holiday Time
Yes being married means sharing family time. It’s never one-sided. You have to be around family and that doesn’t always mean everything is everything. So if you know you’re in-laws are capable of drama you have to think of a plan ahead of time. Some drama is small meaning there will be arguments but no fighting or disrespect. Some drama is huge where cursing and fights can happen. Either way know your tolerance level.
Communication is Key
Have a conversation with your mate on what you will do in certain scenarios. Some couples even drive in separate cars so they can leave. This though needs to be allowed for both sides of family and not just one. Like ladies you can’t be ready to roll but side eye your husband when he’s with your family and decides to the same. You could endure the drama filled fest with knowledge that it’s only a day. It’s up to you and your mate. Be clear in the way you both want to proceed. These conversations do get strained. I know from first hand experience. But mutual respect and love will allow a game plan to bring you through.
In-Laws and Thanksgiving
The bottom line is regardless of any issues you have with your in laws it’s important to focus on what the day is about. There could be a chance that your in laws may be who they are and still have issues but do your part. Always remain respectful and courteous. Take a deep breath, eat well, and when you’re ready to go then do that. Do not let issues with an in law (s) stop you from enjoying your time. There are non traditional things like a special dinner for you and your husband/wife. This is when you take the time to have a special Thanksgiving brunch together or share a Thanksgiving inspired dessert together with your significant other.
Division can creep in if you allow it. Although simply ignoring may not be in the cards for you. Allowing others full control on your emotions is within your control. One piece of advice my Mother gave me was simply not allowing my In laws to ruffle my feathers. The second that went down I felt more in control emotionally.
Have a great holiday and don’t stress it so much. Happy Thanksgiving!
